Noustan - Continuum

I’ve been feeling often that i’m too far gone
Present in the absence of god, too forlornly
The cost of my dreams is a loss of that grasp
That keeps my sanity - unknowns are too vast
Stuck on the tightrope, all things below to aghast
To describe depictions not served by fiction
Still i might go - addictions to unknowns amass
In my mind, the journey surpassed the path

The eyes, the eyes - the blackened sky
To it i cried to no response
I am so lost, this is the cost to not unsee
The images live inside of me
The feelings corrodе philosophy
The visions of which the gods benеath
Come take the bliss of peace
Whenever i think of the safety of sleep

I feel a constants never constant in this bitter nonsense
The changes sway just like the wind and bring more pain upon me
The past is echoing, how can i live remembering
Things that are too unsettling, memories too embarrassing
Path of a professed heresy, barely scraping by in the crevices of my mind
The meadows have fallen dry; i no longer have tears to cry to refill it
I feel i live just like krillin, my power is non-existent
I got no instant transmission to help me travel the distance and escape this fate
How can i ever just make a change?
Feeling so broken inside and there ain’t a piece that i need within this game
Feel like my feelings are never tamed
Wondering why do i feel this way, wallow in all of my blackest days
Following negative tactics raised in me and fostered
There ain't much in me i can offer, but a couple of rhymes
The fleeting of everything that is divine
The fact that we live on a limited time is all known already so

What is there left for me to give?
I’m trying to fill this emptiness
But the void don’t never get full
It just shows me i’m a made fool
Ain’t nothing real in this ill pool
It’s as murky as life and it’s black matters
The life that i live feels trite and straight to the point stagnant
Cold now are the tracks that go nowhere pleasant

All to apparent is the sadness within me
But i don’t understand why i can’t just admit it
For the bulk of my life, i remained at a distance
From everyone - tell me what can’t be done
I remain reticent, silent
Hollow dreams of freedom imprisoned within my eyelids
Remember that i am fighting for reasons to be enlightened
But every day that i live feels like i’m clashing with titans
Leviathans drown my ego and so i just sit here writing
Wondering if my purpose is purposeless in the lighting
All i can do is quit - either that or keep trying
I can’t ever really quit so i guess ima keep fighting