Scot the woz - Why don't you play them

★ Verse 1 ★
It's not FlingSmash, Geist, or Burnout Crash
Not "Mario Party 6" or "Ultra Smash"
Even "Clubhouse Games" or "Wii Fit Plus"
Nor "Family Feud" on SNES

If the games I play, whether good or bad
With troupes in common to my favorite do-dads
It may be rushed, or plain, or flawed
But they aren't RPG's
Oh, thank god!

★ Pre-Chorus ★
Are my tastes just bad?
Am I the one to blame?
Or is it RPGs that are dumb and lame

★ Chorus ★
Why don't you play them?
They just take so damn long to complete
Why don't you play them?
60 hours, just to rinse and repeat
But you'll just grind for years to defeat those monsters
Why waste all this time on just one game?
Why don't you play them?

★ Verse 2 ★
Turn-based battles and too much text
I'd rather be out not having sex
Menu clutter and useless stats
And "Random Encounters" can kiss my ass

No gameplay till hours in
Combat-ready! How did I win?
The same thing happens over again
And then the fun part comes up when?

I miss one thing, now I'm lost
Did one inch of text really mean a-lot?
Some shop with items, I can't afford
So brag for money, you won't be bored!
I'm tired, I'm scared, I'm not having fun
There's no other way this can be spun
What do I do? What do I check?
It's an RPG, what did I expect?

(Sax solo)

★ Ending ★
Why don't you play them?
They're so good, you can't have options (Listen guys)
Why don't you play them?
They're not my style!
(Why don't you, why don't you)

★ outro, spoken ★
number 2: WAIT YOUR TURN F*CKER!