Max Bennett Kelly - Happy, Healthy, Well-Adjusted

★ Verse 1 ★
All my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted
So when Chris took shots of vodka, he looked disgusted
And that's why Blake's at UPS and Logan busses (oh)
Oh, all my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted

★ Chorus ★
I watch Naruto on my ex-girlfriends Netflix
When I have casual sex I wear my grandma's necklace
Another notch on my belt, cross off my father's checklist
I don't wake up at all, I just eat my breakfast

★ Verse: Screaming Neighbors ★
What the fuck is this? It's way too loud!
You're playing the base, the pool water is vibrating
You guys woke up my fucking wife
It's not cool!

★ Verse ★
All my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted
Look how Ryan's full-time offer was interrupted
And I know Taylor dated Matt, we don't discuss it
She don't owe me a thing
Oh, all my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted

★ Chorus ★
So can you tell me why
I watch Naruto on my ex-girlfriends Netflix?
When I have casual sex I wear my grandma's necklace
Another notch on my belt, cross off my father's checklist
I don't wake up at all, I just eat my breakfast

★ Outro ★
All my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted