Tom Cardy - Snake Eyes
We have lived through years of a global pandemic (Years of a global pandemic)
And I'm amazed that, still, mother****ers don't get it (Still, mother****ers don't get it)
If you run a restaurant, cafe
I appreciate things got dicey
Patrons are back, that's good for you
But buckle up, buckaroo, there's one more thing you gotta do
★ Pre-Chorus ★
(Step one) Put on your big-boy shoes
(Step two) Walk into your bathroom
(Step three) Take a look at the ledge at the top of your sink and think:
★ Chorus ★
"Do I need sanitizer next to soap?" ("No, I don't")
"Am I a sick proprietor who gets off sexually
When peoplе confuse them when thеy wash their hands? Probably"
I, I can't describe the rush
When I watch people wash their hands
Place your bet, it's sanitizer roulette
Snake eyes, motherfucker (It's like a peppermint snail just gooed on my hand)
You lose, clean hand, buddy (It's like a ghost brushed its teeth and spat on my hand)
Sanitizer on a wet hand, oh yeah
You can run, but I'm always gonna find ya
I'm gonna get my sanitizer in ya
Snake eyes, motherfucker
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Tom Cardy
Biography
Tom Cardy is an improviser and musician who’s love for performing and comedy can all be traced back to his love of improv from his high school days. Whilst studying psychology and music, Tom wrote and performed for several Sydney University arts revues as well as his own sell out comedy festival shows, all the while teaching improv and sketch at high schools around Sydney.
Tom is a multi-instrumental composer, who’s love of combining comedy and music has seen him compose for the likes of SBS’ The Feed, Amazon series The Moth Effect, the Sydney University Revue and the award winning musical Inner West Side Story. As well as composing and teaching musical improv, Tom has also musically accompanied a variety of improv performances (Cranston Cup, Celebrity Theatresports, The Bear Pack, Impro Australia‘s Theatresports Schools Competition).
Blending comedy and music, Tom’s own musical comedy videos have millions of likes online, with a combined total of over 1M people following him on different platforms. In August 2021 he released his first EP Artificial Intelligence.