Tom Cardy - Soft Boy
Band shirt, not one you've heard before
I'm al-ternative to my core
E-mo-tion-al around the girls
They'd like to do sex with me
Hey girl, wrote you some poetry
I'm di-fferent to society
I'm woke, politicaly correct
My instagram bio says feminist
So you're a smart girl
Had a broken heart girl
Supports creative arts girl
Do you read Decartes girl?
I'm a good boy
So misunderstood boy
A tiny bit unwashed boy
Sleeps up in a loft boy
I'm a soft boy
Ciggies and donnie darko
I've seen all of tarantino
You could watch me sniff some coke
Or give myself a stick and poke
I'm so fucking depressed
Yet somehow I'm still the best
I don't like chicks that are clingy
Please don't touch my beanie
★ Julia Robertson ★
You send some real wierd messages
Screenshot, your texts to all my friends
We laugh, when you say Kevin Parker
Should have been your father
Of course, you have your own podcast
Not that, I think I ever asked
Ro-man-tics are not constantly stoned
And hit on all the women I know
I'm a nice girl
Had some good advice girl
Wants to cut the ties girl
Think I'd rather die girl
You're a fuck boy
Just a massive cuck boy
Almost unemployed boy
Type that I avoid boy
You're a soft boy
(Ugh, stop texting me)
★ Tom Cardy ★
Of course, I understand you
Now can, I touch your left boob
You've taken it too far now
Don't make fun of Tame Impala
If you refuse my date
I'll try it on your housemate
I'm the human version of soy
I'm a soft boy
Song Description:
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Tom Cardy - Kermit the Frog Voice
Girl I bet that you would look good On the dance floor Painted green Doing a Kermit the Frog voice Girl I bet that you'd look good all the time As long as you're
Tom Cardy - Bards have all the fun
{Tom} A single flute note is played as the background music begins {DM, spoken} On the horizon of this forest path you see a group of dark cloaked figures
Tom Cardy - Beautiful Mind
{Intro: Tom Cardy, Brian David Gilbert} Please take a seat Never really done this before That's okay, just tell me the first thing that comes into your head Okay
Tom Cardy - Time To Buy
{Intro -- Vic Zerbst} Welcome to TimeToBuy.com! Now loading Virtual Agent. Please allow cookies, keep your eyes on the screen and... Try not to scream {Verse 1 --
Tom Cardy - 4055
{Introduction -- Tom Cardy} You know when you're doing a song about the future space age... You gotta start with a cliché, y'know? Look... {Verse 1 -- Tom
Tom Cardy - Weird Guy
(Tom Cardy & Montaigne) {Intro} I am a weird guy A very strange guy A nonspecific guy Just a very weird guy (Just a very weird guy) {Verse
Tom Cardy - Flirt
{intro} hey michael, what's my, uh, facebook password again? why? your friend tom has sent me a facebook friend request, i'd like to accept it. ah fu-
Tom Cardy - Level Clear
Boss dead, Level clear, Where do i go from here? Walk home, Try to eat, I'm not hungry, Go to sleep I can't sleep, Lie in bed, Think about what bad guy said "Even if
Tom Cardy - Snake Eyes
{Intro} We have lived through years of a global pandemic (Years of a global pandemic) And I'm amazed that, still, mother****ers don't get it (Still, mother****ers
Tom Cardy - Soft Boy
{Tom Cardy} Band shirt, not one you've heard before I'm al-ternative to my core E-mo-tion-al around the girls They'd like to do sex with me Hey
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Tom Cardy
Biography
Tom Cardy is an improviser and musician who’s love for performing and comedy can all be traced back to his love of improv from his high school days. Whilst studying psychology and music, Tom wrote and performed for several Sydney University arts revues as well as his own sell out comedy festival shows, all the while teaching improv and sketch at high schools around Sydney.
Tom is a multi-instrumental composer, who’s love of combining comedy and music has seen him compose for the likes of SBS’ The Feed, Amazon series The Moth Effect, the Sydney University Revue and the award winning musical Inner West Side Story. As well as composing and teaching musical improv, Tom has also musically accompanied a variety of improv performances (Cranston Cup, Celebrity Theatresports, The Bear Pack, Impro Australia‘s Theatresports Schools Competition).
Blending comedy and music, Tom’s own musical comedy videos have millions of likes online, with a combined total of over 1M people following him on different platforms. In August 2021 he released his first EP Artificial Intelligence.